Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize