even my farts smell like vagina
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
