Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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