dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
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She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
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I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"