: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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