My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
