You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
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