It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Randomize