Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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