dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
