If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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