By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
