i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?