I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
