and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Randomize
