If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
