I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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