so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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