if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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