You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
