...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she pinky promised me she was 18
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Randomize
