Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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