Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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