I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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