Girls should come with a carfax report
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize