She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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