I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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