she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
