Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize