i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
