HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
