just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Randomize
