shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize