I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
