I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
