Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Just cropdusted the office
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize