Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Randomize
