i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize