I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Damn victory sex feels great
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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