So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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