That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
soo... how was my night?
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