Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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