You work out of a Hotel?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
The struggles of a small town man whore
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
