Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
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I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
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I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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