I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
