new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
