I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night