That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
