Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize