So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
